More Ink, Shades of Disinterest, Witch Boobs and more

Holy Moses it's been a while - I last posted in May 2013!  Truth be told , as much as I have missed writing, inspiration has been seriously lacking. Time to catch up. I have crossed a few things off the list since we last chatted, so let me give you a brief summary - in no particular order of completion!  This could take a little while, so pull up a chair, make sure your glass is filled and your phone on silent!

FL No 17: Tattoo

Last you heard I had endured a gruelling 5 odd hour tattoo session getting my exquisite tiger tattoo done. After a couple of months it was beautifully healed and I went back for another 2 hour session getting a touch up.  Kak sore.  Seriously. I think the whole tattooing over already tattooed skin is an issue which I shall not been keen on repeating. However, and on the subject of repeating, in January I went for number 4!  I am so glad I found Jose cos this guy is an exceptional artist!  Truly.  He did some astonishingly lovely shading and I am now the proud owner of this beauty:

Just done!

It only took a few hours to do and healed in record time!  I am so ready for the next one!

FL No 28: Read the entire 50 Shades series

I tried. I really, really gave it my best shot. But I do not think I have ever read such shite in my entire life. Ever. Even skipping ahead to the "good" bits was a waste of time. Yawn.  So I made an executive decision, at around page 69 (hehehe), that

Consider this one done and over with. Moving swiftly on!

FL No 13: Go to an outdoor music festival

Rocking the Daisies.  It was to be my first outdoor camping festival ever and I was so hyped and excited. I think I picked the wrong festival, to be honest.  It pretty much consisted of weather colder that a witch's titty and approximately 16000 pissed/tripping/dof people running around in Onesies.  Although the campsite was fabulous (we booked in at Heartbreak Motel) and the music itself was brilliant, the whole experience left me sadly under-whelmed.   The weekend pretty much went like this:  Buy a drink. Drink it. Find a friend. Lose a friend. Buy overpriced food.  Eat it. Drink some more. Find another friend, drink with them and then lose them too. Have a Jagemeister. Find a friends. Buy an animal hat. Freeze. Drink. Freeze. Stand in a veritable mosh pit waiting for Skunk Anansie. Freeze. Leave said mosh pit and move to the fire pit to defrost. Head to the tent where Steve and I dressed in every single item of clothing we had packed, crawl under the blankets and wait for dawn.

I have been told, by those in the know, that the festival to go to is Up the Creek so I may try that next time. In the meantime, however, I can cross this one out.

No 40: Build a Sandcastle AND No 75: Swim in the sea during a rainstorm

Isn't it amazing how we set up great big exciting plans and nature turns around and says "OH HELL NO". During the first week of January the kids, Steve and I went camping in Langebaan.  Yes, on purpose. You wudda thunk I knew better right? Ulla and Berno (bless their cotton socks) joined us on the Saturday. It rained.  And rained. And rained.  Did I mention that this was January? In the Cape?  It rained. We managed to make a semi-sheltered area using a gazebo, painters plastic, an old tarp, arb pieces of plastic, a bucket and some other crap we scavenged.

So. Much. Rain.

At one (very) brief point there was a break in the rain and we all made a mad dash for the beach, shovel, winch and beers in hand - the plan was to build an epic sand castle.

Elaborate? Maybe not?  A castle? Open to interpretation. Sand? Indeed!

Don't judge.  After the exertion of building this superb specimen of sandcastle we headed into the water, laughing and frolicking (yes, I said frolicking) in the waves, when all of a sudden the water went extremely calm and the heavens opened.  What an incredible experience.  Standing shoulder deep in the calmest water, watching rain drops hitting the surface.  We stood there for a few minutes, completely mesmerized.   Until reality hit.  Our towels, our clothes, the last few items we had left which were not already soaked, were lying on the sand getting completely drenched. While it lasted, however, it was an almost ethereal spiritual experience which would have fit perfectly in some cheesy movie scene, but which we were blessed with. I therefore took the liberty of adding this experience to my Fucket List - No 75, done!

No 3: Climb a Mountain

Totally did this.  Almost died - true story - but did it! Lion's Head, let me just tell you, is not as little as it appears from your couch.  It is kak high and scary as shit! The truth - which no one tells you beforehand - is that you don't WALK up Lion's Head.  You climb the bloody thing.   How there aren't more people falling down the side to their death is beyond me.  One sunny Sunday, a few weeks ago, the fandamily, together with our beautiful friends Jules and Marina and their son Benjamin, took on this epic adventure.  DUDE!

There I stand - not a cooking clue what was ahead of me!

Huge props to Jules who carried Benjamin on his back all the way up that bitch!

At the top of Lion's Head

I managed to deal with the whole "going up" part of the climb without too much of an issue - it was the coming down nonsense which I struggled with. I am somewhat terrified of heights and ended up having a bit of a panic attack a few metres into our descent.  There I was perched on the precipice, convinced I was going to fall to my death, unable to move either up or down, convinced that I would require airlifting off the mountain with tears and snot streaming down my face.  Steve had to get all "tough love" on my ass and tell me to stop being such a bloody baby and to get myself down the mountain immediately.  I wiped away the tears, blew away the snot, put on my figurative big girl panties and tried not to be intimidated by the small children galloping past me as they made their way down the mountain. Little show offs! Needless to say I did not fall to my death.  I can, however, say that I am very unlikely to take on this particular challenge again any time soon.

Well my friends, that is all the update you are getting for now. Next Saturday - 5th April - sees us taking on the Impi Challenge in Stellenbosch. It would be fair to say that I am completely and absolutely excited and completely and absolutely terrified in equal parts. If you don't know what the Impi Challenge involves, have a look at this YouTube video!

Keep an eye out for the update on the antics of Team Weekend Warriors coming to a blog post near you!

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